Frequently Asked Questions

• What the fuck is going on?

  To celebrate this season of incredible Black Friday deals, Cards Against Humanity is offering a dazzling array of consumer products for 99% off.

• Is this real?

  Yes. All of these products are actually available for 99% off, and if you purchase something we will actually ship it to you.

• But the deals seem too good to be true!

  We’ve chosen to make them true. That’s the miracle of Black Friday.

• Can the global financial system handle these deals?

  Most economic indicators suggest “no.”

• Surely you must be losing a lot of money on this promotion.

  Oh dear yes. This is a financial catastrophe for our company.

• How were the products on this page selected?

  Our team of experts spent over 500 hours researching the highest-rated consumer goods and exclusive collectable items. Every item was plotted on a six-dimensional chart of desirability, style, functionality, value, charisma, and je ne sais quoi.

• What’s the Absurd Box?

  The Absurd Box is Cards Against Humanity’s brand new 300-card expansion. While it normally retails for $2,000 USD, today it’s available for 99% off.

• I tried to get in on a deal but it sold out!

  You have no one to blame but yourself.

• I thought you were a potato chip company now.

  Yeah, that didn’t work out. We did a 360 pivot.

• What’s your strategy here?

  We might be losing a little money now, but in the long run, we hope to make it up in volume. We like to think we’re following in the footsteps of our hero, Jeff Bezos.

• Is there any language that your lawyers demanded you paste onto this website?

  Yes.

  All items are sold “as-is.” If your item doesn’t arrive, or is damaged in transit to you, or you are otherwise unhappy with the purchase, you are eligible for a refund of up to a maximum of the purchase price you paid (plus applicable sales tax). No exchanges will be made. All items except the Absurd Box are available only in the US. It is your responsibility to ascertain and obey all applicable local, state, federal, and international laws (including minimum age requirements) in regards to the possession, use, and sale of any item purchased from this site. By placing an order, you represent that the products ordered will be used only in a lawful manner.